Today’s article was unfortunately inspired by a brokenhearted friend. She yet again experienced someone close to her leave out her life for what ever reason.
My friend is special. I know for a fact she has been here before in a past life. I know that she holds the tools within to get over this unfortunate event. But it got me to think about how there are people out there who are still learning how to let people go. They will hold on to people beyond there purpose out of selfishness. It’s the satisfaction of having someone there to fill the space of loneliness. Even though those peoples were cool peoples, it’s just that time to let them go.
You know the saying: “people are here either for a season, a reason, or a lifetime.” It basically states that you will have many relationships that come and go and it’s all because as spiritual beings, we naturally feed into each other to either grow or learn. That’s the process of human interaction. When that interaction no longer services you to better yourself or continuously keeps you stagnant, than that’s usually a call for the individual to leave. If they choose to go, Let Them. They no longer need you and you don’t need them, they have served there purpose even though you know it or not. And this is something easier said than done, trust me, I know. But if you don’t, what begins to happen is that the love or connection formed will slowly deplete. What you guys had, becomes toxic. You’ll begin to see the negative aspects of the individual and you guys will begin to hate each other. I’ve dealt with the father of my child for two years before we called it quits. It was the hardest thing to do for me, but it got bad. It affected my performance at work, it drained me and it split my focus between him and my son. When I officially learned to let go, the heaviness and negativity I felt lifted. I came out of the battle understanding myself more and realized my independence didn’t mean I was lonely but rather free. Free to interact with others and to grow. Keeping people who don’t want to stay (whether it’s said out loud or through there actions) can trap you in negativity and you will surely lose your sense of self. You don’t need that. Understand the tell-all signs when they want to go.
Letting go is hard, and it’s supposed to be because you cared for the individual for so long and breaking the bond takes mental, physical and spiritual energy. It’s possible to do it though! No one is attached to another person in order to live, you can ride solo- dolo and still live. That sense of attachment is lack of self-esteem, which many people face when they experience things like this. It’s normal and can be worked on through time, patience and discipline
How to Let Go?
First step is to create distance. Cut them off cold turkey. Of course in the case if your situation involves a child, you can either have a reliable non biased mediator to create contact or keep all conversations strictly child- related. Set public meeting spots such as a library or park. But in the case that you don’t have a kid, let the person go on socials, block them on your phone, and if interactions with them is inevitable, make the conversations professional and find support from other friends and/ or family. Also, for you snap chat lovers, you must end streaks with them. I know that might be the hardest part but keeping your distance will allow you to heal. Trust me on this one.
Clean your home. Open windows and doors to let out all the negative energies that may be trapped and some burn sage too. To some people, doing these things are metaphorical. It helps serve as a visual to allow you to let go. Cleaning the home not only helps serve as a visual but it brings in good Chi and come on! Who doesn’t enjoy a nicely cleaned home? I’ll like below where you can get cheap cleaning products and sage.
Bathing in bath salts with white candles can not only promote relaxation, but it is known to remove toxins and negativity from within and promote relaxation . Make sure that you have enough alone time to execute this well. You want to be relaxed to feel it’s benefits fully. Play happy music or even binaural beats to enhance serenity.
In your manifestation journals write what you wish to come out of everything that happened. Remember in order to manifest things for the future write in the present tense. You can write affirmations such as: I am strong enough to understand and except that when people walk in and out of my life, it doesn’t mean I’m not loveable. I am loved! I have an abundance of friends and acquaintances who love and care for me. Etc… Try writing often, everyday if you can.
Also sometimes people who choose to leave often times like to come back when they see you doing well. Its because when they see you again, they see a new light they haven’t seen before, they see your growth and growth is attractive and radiates brightly. Sometimes the seperation was necessary for the moment so the two individuals to grow, but often times the seperation is meant to be a forever thing. You have to do a pros and cons list to evaluate whether the person is worth bringing back into your life. Sometimes the other individual refuses to grow and bringing them back in can hinder your growth and new found confidence. You have to just look at all the options and make the decision yourself. I wish there was a cheat sheet for this, but all I can tell you that if you do decide to bring back the individual and it doesn’t work out again, thats a sign that leaving should stay permanent.
Lastly relearn to love yourself and thank the individual for leaving. As mentioned before, the reason why we hold on to people way past there time is because of selfishness thats caused by low self- esteem. You have to reintroduce the love you once had for yourself to yourself and know that you are still loved by many. Thank the individual for coming into your life and teaching you all the things you now know. Thank them for leaving because they helped you understand detachment from people and helped you understand yourself a little more.
It’s an Expedition in Understanding Yourself
Understand this isn’t an easy task. You might fail a few times, but it will continue to happen if you allow it to. Self discipline is key in getting through it all. Remember you are all beautiful people. Things like this only make you stronger. You are not the only one to go through things like this, so never feel alone. It’s is a necessary part of life because you understand yourself better. You will notice how you process your thoughts, whether negative or positive, you’ll understand the causes for your actions and best of all, you’ll see how strong you truly are. Everyone in this world is capable of inner strength but only if you choose to believe in yourself.
If you guys had experienced events in letting go of people, share the experience and what you learned from it. How did you manage to get through it? What lessons you learned from the individual? Is there a repeat of types of people you see in your life? Share it down in the comments below.
May Love, Light and God guide you through Life’s journey